


Sound Effects

by DonttellmybrotherIwrotethis



Series: Linkguistics [3]
Category: The Legend of Zelda & Related Fandoms, The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild
Genre: Gen, Humor, Lack of Communication, Languages and Linguistics, Link Messing with People, Messing with Guardians, Sound Effects, Ten-Thousand Year Old Link
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-25
Updated: 2020-09-25
Packaged: 2021-03-07 16:29:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,896
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26650708
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DonttellmybrotherIwrotethis/pseuds/DonttellmybrotherIwrotethis
Summary: We asked, "What if Link from ten-thousand years ago was helping the Champions." He asked, "What if we had sound effects?"
Series: Linkguistics [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1691452
Comments: 13
Kudos: 44





	Sound Effects

**Author's Note:**

> This is another bit that did not quite fit into Linkguistics. Some commenters gave me this idea on AO3. Specifically USER182K. It feels like it is missing something...

Rhoam looked between Link and the Guardian which had been set here in the hallway. Link seemed almost to be talking to the machine and, even stranger, it seemed to be beeping back? Rhoam had requested a conversation with the young man and decided to ignore language barriers temporarily. He decided that if he talked in a very slow and loud voice, that he would be understood to some extent. This was despite all evidence to the contrary, including Rhoam's own common sense. Link decided to roll with it. The two men began speaking the same language but with thousands of years difference in it.

"Sir Link, I am grateful that the Sword has chosen a hero at long last. May I ask you something?"

Link adjusted his new shield's strap. "Wecanp retendto underst andea ch other. Th ero botsunde rstand me, butt heyare n'tpe ople. Rev aliishe retoda ysoI' minn eedofn onhost ileconv ersation." Daruk had been nothing but nice after the initial meeting and honestly was a great friend even with language barriers. Mipha was a very kind person and that translated well. Urbosa was cautiously warming up to Link after he'd thrown himself into the path of a laser beam. Link's tendency to wander off was driving Revali towards an early molt. The other people around the castle Link had met were all confused by his odd behavior and habits. The strangeness of Link was contributed to by the way he would address the Guardians.

"My daughter, the Princess Zelda, is reluctant to trust you, but your presence may be able to help her unlock her own powers and face this coming crisis."

"Wou ldyoube lieve Zelda won'te venl etmetouc hmyow nSlate? Ic ustomizedtha tthinga ndIneed ittoa cces sa llthesyst ems. Tooba dthetowe rsareo ffline, ifth emapisan yindica tion. Sh edoesn't kno whowto checkthes etting satall."

"I must admit, were disaster and ruin not threatening the land, I would leave you with the historians. They believe you connected to the mechanical army of old." They were dead certain.

"Doy ouknowh owha rditisto getinandmanu al lyfixst uffwit hou tmySl ate? I'mregre ttinglo ckingmo stverba lcom mandsfo rsecu rity..." Link trailed off and racked his brain for any way he could interact with the Guardians when he was not allowed enough time to work on them. He'd been allow to touch one, but the people pulled him away once he'd started opening up the access and ripping things out in a vain attempt to work without a user interface. Without a screen of some kind, Link knew it was not going to be simple. Verbal command lists were severely limited and anti-maliceware updates would need to be done some other way than just having things connect to the towers. Revali was the worst offender by far when it came to deliberately and with malice aforethought ruining Link's mission to run diagnostics. Zelda's Slate-hogging was the biggest obstacle.

Rhoam said, "It can be overwhelming to have so much resting on your shoulders... How is your progress in learning to speak coming along? Daruk and Mipha are optimistic that you are learning quickly but I wonder if it might be better to assign an official tutor? The Champions have their own duties and responsibilities which they are concerned with."

Link smiled and said, "Ijust remembe reds omet hinggo od! Acti vates ongbirdp roto colforth edawn. Alsovi cto ryfanf arefor Mipha, Daruk, Urbosa, and Revali. Actu ally,ad dthe tar geth itsoun dfo r Revali," to a nearby Guardian, which responded with a confirming beep. The King looked at the Guardian. Link pretended to be innocent of any plotting.

"See, this illustrates another point I'm trying to make. You have been acknowledged by the Master Sword and the Guardians. The common people appreciate your appearance with the sword. It's a sign of hope."

"Acti vateit emches tjin gle." Link said with a smile and a bow to the king.

King Rhoam droned on about how the strange behavior of the Guardians was being taken as a sign of the Goddess' favor instead of an omen. (The King may have had a hand in spreading those rumors.) Link nodded and said things in appropriate tones of voice to match what he thought King Rhoam wanted to hear. The content of what he was saying meandered through a list of songs and sound effects.

* * *

"Looks like it might rain soon. We should get inside." Said a knight.

Another knight looked up skeptically. "I doubt it's gonna rain anytime soon. We don't need to pick up our stuff yet."

The first knight was about to ask how long it would take to move the supply boxes when the knights were interrupted by a set of arpeggios from a nearby Guardian. The Song of Storms ended just before the clouds dumped rain on their heads.

* * *

Impa came to the courtyard where her sister's crew toiled away. Mipha chatted with Impa briefly before she turned her attention back to a Sheikah doctor. Impa normally stayed away from her sister when not guarding Zelda, but her spare stealth boots had been appropriated by Purah for reasons incomprehensible. A quick gesture from a scientist pointed her to the chest where the shoes had been stowed. Impa crouched down to open the chest and the moment she touched it, the Guardian sitting next to it took notice.

Impa fixed a baleful look on the eye of the machine. It stared back and made no moves.

The moment the chest latch was slid and the lid began to lift, Impa heard a **"Beeebeeebee-"** and immediately spun with her sword to the machine. The machine stopped making noise as the lid fell shut. The eye had no laser charging and was innocently staring back at Impa. Impa snorted and went back to the chest.

The same events repeated themselves as Impa lifted the lid and spun to face the beeping machine. The beep trailed off as the lid closed.

"Oh, Impa? It's been doing that for a while now." Mipha said. "Watch."

Mipha crouched and, as the chest lid lifted higher, the machine's expectant little trill crescendoed. **"BeeebeeebeeEEPEBEEPBEE,"** Mipha dropped the lid, **"-eee?"**

Impa was intrigued, although she would not admit it within earshot of Purah. She would not have thought a Guardian would sound... disappointed? "Is this an alarm function they activated by accident?"

Mipha smiled. "I don't think so. Watch this."

Mipha opened the chest and started to reach in. **"Beeeebeee...,"** The Guardian became louder and higher pitched as Mipha finished moving the lid upwards. Mipha picked up the shoes and lifted them above her head while the machine cheerfully went, **"BEEEP BEEP BEEP BEEEEEEEEEE!"** Impa raised an eyebrow at the music making machine. Maybe the Princess Zelda would know why on earth the ancient Sheikah would have put this function into the runes. Mipha repeated the process just to hear the happy little fanfare as she held things up in the air. She was going to show this to her little brother once she went home.

* * *

Revali aimed, Revali fired, and it always followed that Revali hit what he was aiming for. His sessions, minus his invitations for spectators to watch, consisted of the sound of arrows being fired and hitting targets. The air would take the sounds of arrow flight and mingle those with the rustle of his wings and the swirling gusts Revali called from the sky. Today there was a new noise in this mix that should not have belonged.

Every time an arrow hit a target, if a Guardian was present, it would do a strange two note beep.

Revali was not amused that he would have to move training grounds at Hyrule Castle. Link had to be responsible. Especially since the jingle only happened when Revali shot at targets.

* * *

Since Urbosa was not watching Link and Zelda had her own project at the moment, it was time to test some recruits. Sparring practice was always fun and Urbosa felt a proud joy in helping teach newbies well. Usually the courtyard didn't have little victory fanfares whenever a battle ended. Above the cheering, the people kept hearing a triumphant chorus of Guardians going 'Beep.'

It was already obvious this was Link's fault. The different fanfares for Champions winning was a nice touch. She was less cheerful when the entire area of Castletown was awakened by music at sunrise. They all met with Zelda while Link was eating breakfast in the courtyard with the research team. Link was occupied with the machine in front of him and had another smaller Guardian holding his porridge while he inspected the joints. He'd spent the better part of an hour yelling gibberish at scientists that were working on Guardians. The reprimands' content was not understood. ("Whydi dyo udisa blet hefai lsafeme chani smso nthese ocul arfoci? Youp e op learegoi ngt oget us allkil led!") Zelda had asked them to pack traveling clothing and prepare to leave on her birthday.

The other preparations were routine, but they soon were engaged in heated debate about whether they should bring Link with them.

"I really do not want this... slime near her highness for any length of time. Wouldn't letting him anywhere within the vicinity of the spring be considered blasphemy?"

Zelda sighed irritably. Juggling excuses and keeping the story of how they met Link consistent had been one of many stressors in her life. "Look, Revali, I see your point but we can't leave Link here. If we do, we are going to come back to heaven knows what insanity..." Zelda and her chosen Champions all turned to look at Link. Link seemed to be teaching one robot a step dance. He happily spooned porridge into his mouth between commands issued to the machine.

Daruk said, "Well, we will see a fully choreographed dance routine at the very least."

Mipha was optimistic. "While I do want to see that, this trip will be a good opportunity to teach him battle commands."

* * *

In the distant future, Link was regretting sneaking into the castle. He'd come in hope that a memory would trigger with useful information. He didn't remember how to use the built-in manual shutdown. (The manual shutdowns he was resorting to were of the explosive variety.) Nor did Link remember the location of useful gear in this Hylia-forsaken death-trap. Link remembered a few completely useless verbal codes that may have been overridden by the Malice in his machines. Even if it did work, how would an item-get fanfare help save Hyrule?

Link skimmed Zelda's diary, decided it was futile to try understanding what he read, then thought _What the heck, might as well try it._ He wasn't getting much from the unfamiliar language in ink.

Calamity Ganon, and Zelda, watched Link run through the building while weaving in and out of dangerous situations. He screamed codewords with no significance to anyone but himself and the robots. He grabbed a shield. After nine laser hits to the chest accompanied by Mipha's disapproving glare, Link teleported off leaving a very confused group of monsters. A fairy wobbled through the air and vanished back to her home fountain post-resurrection.

Weeks later, Calamity Ganon was sick of the Sun Songs every morning, the rain warnings, the battle music whenever monsters spotted people, the accompaniment to Lynel marches, the nightly lullabies...


End file.
